Thursday, June 11, 2009

License to breed

This might be a fired up post because I am passionate/pissed off about this subject. Most of my friends have kids or plan to have them in the next few years. I try not to judge because I am not a parent myself but I do judge and I am not even a little bit sorry after what I came up with here. There are certain behaviors and actions that I believe should be instilled into every child. This is just my belief and I am sure no one cares but I am putting it out there because I am fired up today. I feel like the world is pretty messed up right now and Lionel Richie was right, the children are our future. So why is it then that some mommies act like whores? They bring home random men, talk badly about baby daddies, mess around with trifling’, nasty married men and wonder why the world doesn’t respect them as single mothers. What a shining example you are for your young daughter. Teach her that she can sell her sorry self to get her bills paid, to get those new shoes or to get where she wants in life. Teach her to depend on a man and when he leaves, to find another to take care of her. Girls need to be taught that you respect other women. You don’t sleep with their husbands, boyfriends or fathers (yep, I went there). They need to be loved at home so they don’t go looking to the streets of the first bum that says he loves them. They need daddies, not sperm donors who may or may not pay for their support. This is a 24/7 job. Not one that can be dropped for men, jewelry, cars or entertainment. Even if you have been left to do it by yourself; you signed up…it’s your job now. Weather you are married, divorced, dating or just sleeping around once you become a mother you make that commitment for life. A lot of women I know don’t know the proper way to maintain a house, a checkbook or a family. How do they intend to pass this along to their daughters and teach them the proper way? I realize they might not have been taught themselves but that is where breaking the cycle and being better than our parents comes into play.

I am almost in more fear for the little boys. It’s no wonder that we already have so many dead beat daddies on the street. If things continue the way they are now, you can expect more. In fact, you can expect the little girls you are raising to have to deal with them. This will be the lot from which they choose their future husbands. Yay! A lot of them have no daddy or male role model. They watch mama let men treat her like shit and that is their example of how to treat a woman from that moment forward. Abusers actually start abusing at a very young age; most of the time their mother is the target. They don’t learn respect for themselves, let alone other people. They are raised to believe that women are objects for mans pleasure and that is how they will treat them. I see little boys hit, kick and spit on their parents (mostly mom’s) who are usually begging them to stop. What happened to beating your children? I am a big believer that a good ole fashioned ass whoopin’ goes a long way. I am not saying spank your kids daily. You know when they have gone too far. Are you afraid they will be mad at you? They might not like you? What if they put their own life in danger, or yours? I beg you to consider what the world will think of them when they are a grown-ass man acting that way. I have dated some of these deadbeats in my time and I blame all of their mothers for what they became…or didn’t.

Everybody wants to be their child’s friend. I feel bad that I can’t give you my time so here is some money or $200 shoes or a $500 phone. Kids don’t know relationships these days. In our day friends were forged during kickball games, on the playground, in the classroom or by some sort of personal interaction. Most children these days can’t form a full sentence because they don’t talk, they text. They also cannot spell because they use abbreviations that are no where near the correct spelling. They cannot write in cursive. They don’t teach cursive in schools in America anymore. No cursive, no signature…and we all sign in print like 2nd graders. Yeah, but we are superior to other countries. Oh, and don’t talk about important issues like race, sexual orientation or gender equality. Just tell them you have 1 black friend and 1 gay friend/relative (I love this one every time) but don’t treat them as friends/relatives. Just call them niggers and faggots behind their backs…because continuing to breed hate is the answer to the hate already building within this child. Teach them they are superior to all others and to demand respect even it they do not give it and have never earned it. Teach them that random sex with strangers is love. You don’t have to have a relationship or care about someone…you are just there to get yours. Teach them to settle for what they get and never try to do better. Don’t try in school. It’s a waste of time. In fact, just go ahead and have a baby so welfare can be the backbone of the entire family.

Mmmmm-kay. So time to take it to the other side and relieve some of the building pressure. I DO have MANY friends who are great parents. I fully believe that those little girls with mommy and daddy at home will know how a woman should be treated and how a man should act towards his wife. She will also know what it is to be a wife and a mother. She will feel loved by both of her parents and therefore not seeking the pseudo affection of some douche bag just trying to get into her pants. This little girl will learn about partnership and mutual respect. She will learn that loving is a decision, not always a feeling or an act. She will learn to take care of a home as her mother (or father) does; with care, love and concern everyday. She will respect herself and others and therefore she will command to be respected in return. She won’t sleep around or neglect her own babies for selfish reasons because she has been shown the way.

The same goes for the mommies of little men that I know. I fully expect to see some of the most amazing husbands and fathers come out of this batch. Again, they have the influence of both parents. They see how dad loves mom and can’t wait to have a wife to love that much someday. They are affectionate, play full, well balanced kids. Their mommies are their lives and vice versa. They will know how to cook, clean, build things and do their own laundry. These women are raising little men and they know it. They weeded through quite a bit of bad apples to find their frog/toad/prince and they are doing the world a service in their raising our future right.

I realize that every home cannot have both a mommy and daddy. I also have friends who would love nothing more than to have that but they simply do not. Unfortunately it is now your job to be both mother and father. It sucks but it is reality. Hopefully you have a father, brother or cousin that can serve as a good male role model. Or if you are a single dad (they are out there from the fluctuation of whoring mommies), hopefully you have a mother, sister or friend who will be that influence to your daughter. EVERY child needs that, boy or girl.

Children today are committing suicide at an alarming rate. Parents don’t talk to their kids. We allow them to be babysat by fantasy worlds, TV and on-line chat rooms. Most don’t have goals or aspirations beyond living with their parents until they are 40. You would not believe the bargaining that goes on with teenagers. Money, privileges and promises in exchange for good behavior, grades and doing what you should anyway. See, when I was a kid you had good behavior and grades or you didn’t get money, privileges or promises of anything but further grounding.

Some of my friends tell me I don’t understand. When I am a parent it will be different. I don’t think so. My parents were all about tough love. I moved out at 16 and took care of myself. I was able to do that because they forced me to take care of myself at home. I cooked the family dinner, did the dishes and did a lot of the home maintenance. I was doing my own laundry at 10 years old. That was also the same year that dad said I was both old enough and tall enough to mow the grass on the riding mower. We talked about the power of a machine and went over every button, lever and pulley before he would even let me start it. It was another 4 years before I was allowed to mow the lawn when he was not home. He taught me to cut a steak and made a point to say “no daughter of mine will ever depend on a man to cut her meat”. I see girls on dates all of the time who have to have their boyfriend cut up their food. I always think of my dad. I can change oil, rotate tires and operate power tools. I don’t cry weakness when things are heavy or difficult for me. I used to hate that in the restaurant industry when girls would say they couldn’t carry glass racks or ice just so someone else would do it for them. My answer to that was for me to carry 2 at a time and show them that even though I am 50+ pounds lighter, I can do it, so can you. I can’t stand women/girls that further the idea that woman are the weaker sex. They are giving us independent gals a bad name.

You have to have a license to drive, practice law and medicine; most financial professions require them. You also have to have a license to serve liquor, to stay open late…fuck, you need a license to FISH but not to have a kid. Up until the point that my mature responsible friends started having kids, I really did think that only stupid people were breeding. Most of them breeding unwanted mistakes, paid for by the state. I am a democrat but I think we should sterilize women on welfare that continue to produce. If you accept our money, you also accept our conditions. I think gay people should be able to adopt all of these unwanted and unloved children in orphanages. What is the difference between a single woman adopting and 2 women or 2 men? 1 more person to love the child; that is all I can think of. We are doing a shit job of family values so please don’t trump the queer card as your issue with gay adoption. Most of my gay friends (I said most) are the most loving, caring and nurturing bunch of homo’s you have ever met. Their dogs are their kids and there is a lot of love out there for grabs.

The point is there are solutions to all of these problems. I, for one, will offer to help out more in the future. If one of my single mama’s needs a break, I will help because she deserves it. If someone’s marriage needs a break from the kids for a night, I am there. My resolution to my anger is to do more myself. I will not stand by when children hit and kick their mothers. If she is not strong enough to make it clear that is wrong, then I will. I don’t care how anyone feels about it or if I hurt someone’s feelings. It is all of our responsibility to make sure kids understand the world. Unfortunately, some of them are born into homes that are missing key elements to make a child a functioning adult. It really is up to the rest of us to help out. Turning a cheek isn’t working. It hasn’t been working for decades. Our prisons are over crowded and people are killing out of straight up hate. Something has got to change and I for one am starting today.

I didn’t name this bitch Craw Digger for nothing. I hoped I made you think even if you are pissed at what I had to say. I feel much better with all of that off my chest. Thanks blogosphere, almost as good as Calgon.

Each day of our lives we make deposits in the memory banks of our children.-- Charles R. Swindoll

1 comment:

  1. Girl... I bet you feel better after unloading all that shit! You are so very right though on so many levels... and I fear for the future of our kids and their kids. Have you ever seen the movie Idiocracy? It's pretty funny and entertaining to watch, but it won't be so funny when the future really looks like that!