Friday, July 17, 2009

"Répondez s'il vous plaît"

Does anyone know what this means? *Respond if you please* is the literal French translation. RSVP can also stand for "Restricted Seating Verify Participation." It does not mean “be a rude bitch and don’t respond”. You were invited to a party. A party where there will be drinks, maybe food and a few prizes. Have some respect for the hostess (and your friend or family member that the party is for) and let them know that you will or will not be able to attend. If you respond that you will come, kindly show up as you have been counted on. What would you do if you showed up to a party and there was no place to sit or nothing for you to drink? People have counted on you and you should be there. It is just that simple. I understand that things come up, that is why there are phones and e-mail. I realize this is a given to some of us. I would like to say most but I don’t believe that to be true. My friend Anzarel and I recently put on a shower for a mutual friend and very few people responded. Some of those that did respond saying that they would be there just did not show up or call. This is all out rude behavior no matter how you look at it but what do you think it does to the person that the party was for? That is nice for them that people just don’t show up or call. That really makes you feel important to people.

I have personally been involved in the planning and implementation of hundreds of parties. Some friends have gotten married and had multiple babies. Then there are the birthdays, anniversaries and graduations. I have become a master of the 2 hour shower and I love a good adult drinking party. Someone has to be the organizer and it is not always me. No matter who plans the party the response is the same…little to none. I am not sure where Miss Manners, Ms. Etiquette or even Dear Abby led us astray but it is not acceptable to not RSVP, just as it is not acceptable to accept a gift without thanks. It is just a given, or it should be.

The same goes for making plans with people, in my opinion. I made dinner plans for this week with someone that I rarely see but e-mail regularly. We have known each other for 12 years and rarely find the time to catch up. Two months ago we set a tentative date. Then last week I called to see if we were still on and we were. The day of our plans, I e-mailed her to see where and when we were meeting and she responds that she can’t make it and could we do next week? Normally, this would be no big deal but this is not my first ditch by this person and I was upset. I had really been looking forward to catching up. I let it go, knowing that I am overly sensitive this week with Dan being away and basically out of contact. So I went home and enjoyed the night to myself. Many people had asked me to hang out, knowing that I was on my own but I was so pissy at the last minute cancelation that I just went home to clean and chill.

The next day, I get into work all cheery-happy-go-lucky and I log on to Facebook first thing, like I always do and I just could not believe my eyes. You probably wouldn’t believe it if I just told you so I will copy and paste so you get the full affect:

Exhausted, just got done cleaning both dog cages, and giving both the dogs a bath............UH!!
Wed at 8:58pm · Comment · Like Unlike

This was posted by my dinner ditcher WHILE we were supposed to be out together! Ok, so comment? Like? Unlike? Thanks for being a lying bitch? I mean that is worse than canceling a date because you need to wash your hair. You canceled to give your dogs baths? Even if this is not the true reason, she gave no reason and then had the nerve to post her mundane going's on instead of an apology to her ditched friend. (I would never really expect that. Just a suggestion:-))In the end I decided to be the bigger person and let it go; right up until I blogged about it. The high road was feeling really lonely so I took the first exit south and came down to her level. Yeah, I did. Not gonna lie, it feels good. I am pretty sure I will not be rescheduling dinner. I think this was a sign from the Gods or my little gay spirit guide to rinse the non-sense out of my life. This actually feels so good that I could almost single out each person that was a no-call/no-show and hurt my girl’s feelings last weekend for her shower. Because SHE still wishes to be your friend and/or give 2 shits about you, your kids, your husband’s girlfriend or your VD; I’m going to let it go. This is a warning shout out to all though. Nothing is sacred here at Craw Digger. No one will be spared. Happy Friday to my loved ones and a big hearty FU to the rest of you!


  1. Why is it so hard to RSVP?! Or keep plans for that matter. If you say you're gonna do something.. do it! It's not that hard. Bitches got no manners these days! This was the same topic for my next blog... imagine that!

  2. I really did RSVP....I hope you got it through Anna and Laura and don't hate me! ;)

  3. i didn't rsvp to laura's shower, but i did let laura know that i couldn't make it...i totally understand where you are coming from toni...i deal with it every year with our BBQ...i actually thought that u only rsvp if u can make it...hope u dont hate me toni...luv ya

    Stacy :)

  4. This was a great read! And I did get the RSVPs from Gina and Stacy. What I think happened is that many people RSVP'd to Laura, and not to me. People told her that they couldn't come, and I'm sure she assumed that they did what they were supposed to do (tell me!) but they didn't. Oh, that reminds me, I guess I should RSVP to the shower Amy is throwing for Laura...I told Laura, but didn't follow the rules either :)
    I'll tell you what though, I will forever RSVP from now on!

  5. I am not mad at anyone. I just needed a vent. I know it's hard to keep up with things but there were people who said they would be there that just didn't show. I think to save my sanity I just won't ask for RSVP's or regrets. Plan on 3/4 showing and call it a day. You can always take extra food to charity:-)