My friend Laura over at Wringing out my Sponge created her very own award today. This might be TMI for some of you but if you read my blog you know its tough titty for you. I am especially proud of Laura (my friend IRL) for creating this award as she is 8 ½ months pregnant right now and sex is probably the last thing she thinks of before bed. The award is called Expose Yourself and here are the rules.

Tell us 3 things about your sex life. You can make them whatever you want and it doesn't necessarily have to pertain to your current partner (or a partner at all for that matter). You can talk about your likes or dislikes, your kinky fetishes or your secret desires. You can tell us a funny story about the time you were having sex in the woods with your old boyfriend and you both ended up with 1,000 tics. Whatever you want... it’s totally up to you!

1. I am a multiple orgasm girl. I blogged about this a while back. I didn’t know until about 5 years ago and before I learned it about myself I had no idea it was possible. Up until that point I had always controlled sex in my relationships and believe it or not it was over when I was done. This was one of the most beautiful discoveries of my life. I have always enjoyed sex and I have always felt like I enjoyed sex more than the average woman. I definitely think about sex more than most women and I have usually been the instigator to sex in most of my relationships. I usually cannot get enough. I just recently found out that there are women who cannot orgasm from just vaginal sex. I had no idea this was an issue for A LOT of people. I think if women were less embarrassed and/or shamed by sex they could enjoy it a hell of a lot more. I blame the church and mothers who teach children that your sexual organs are your no-no area. I think if we were all brought up with a healthier body and sexual image we would not have the esteem issues that a lot of women do. It would probably go a long way towards a woman’s own self respect too.

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2. I believe that masturbation is the key to a healthy sexual image and sex life. If you don’t know what you want how can you expect someone else to know? I started masturbating at a young age and I was never ashamed of it. I remember talking to my friends about it and being very open even in junior high. I am not a shy person so it doesn’t bother me in the least to masturbate in front of a boyfriend and I just recently learned that this is not true for everyone. Again, it goes back to feeling shame where your genitals are concerned. I spent many years as a single girl and I have never been one to sleep around so it was just me and my trusty vibrator for a long time. I found that I almost preferred it to most men after a while. Even when I am in a relationship I will masturbate a few times a week…or sneak it in in the showerJ I don’t understand women who are jealous of men masturbating or watching porn. Maybe it is because I also enjoy both but I feel like a man can enjoy some porn and his right hand or another woman…you decide. Clearly we all know where I stand.

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3. I did not used to allow anyone south of the boarder. I cannot tell you why. I know at the time I felt very uncomfortable/self conscious with someone’s head in my crotch (no matter how well I knew them). I am most certain that the precious few who were allowed in my younger years had no idea what they were doing. I have personally never been with a woman and I think I am one of the few that has no desire. It is possible that the whole lesbian for a sister ruined the fantasy for me. I digress. I have discussed technique with my lesbian friends (not my sister) and I can assure you that there is a right and a wrong way. (If you are interested, I highly recommend talking to a woman vs. a man…just sayin’) It was not until a certain man who clearly enjoyed the giving of oral pleasure that I was able to let go of my insecurity and just enjoy. Ours was a tumultuous relationship but I will always think of him fondly for making me see the error in my ways. He actually had a hard time convincing me that:

a. He enjoyed it (and he really, really did)
b. I should enjoy it (I learned)
c. It was a completely natural act of loving someone (never how I saw it)

Like I said the relationship was rough but I will admit we had some good sexual chemistry. It also helped to have older women friends who were like “look at how a man enjoys a blowjob and mimic them”. Or another, “just throw your head back, close your eyes and forget he is there”. That one is my personal favorite…just sayin’. A big thanks to Laura for tagging me on this. It was actually quite fun! I am not tagging anyone as my bloggy friends have all been tagged. I am such a rebel!