The Aspen Diet

I ran into a gay couple recently that I am extremely close to. It has been too long since we have connected and I had been trying for months to see or talk to them. Immediately I noticed that the younger of the 2 was looking rather thin. He used to be a bigger, boisterous boy so it was quite noticable. I have known this man/child since he was a wee lad and he has always been on the "chubby" side so I had to ask, "girl, what happened to you?" I don't mean this offensively but homegirl lost the chub and then some. He starts going on and on about this new workout routine, blah, blah, blah. I am believing him until I hear a bitchy, under the breath comment from his boyfriend, "yeah, it's called the Aspen diet". I was like Judy Jetson watching George fly by the house on his way home...super confused. I noticed a few other "off" things about this pair and filed them for contemplation later.

So I am on my way home that night trying to relax with my thoughts when the "Aspen Diet" comment will not leave me. Aspen diet? What is Aspen known for? That is simple...skiing! What do you ski on? Again, simple-Simon, SNOW. What drug is universally refered to as snow, ski, powder, candy? Cocaine! (Can you see the light come on too?)I almost wrecked my car. Keep in mind I have known this particular boy a very long time and this was very unexpected.

I was in the process of thinking about how I was going to discuss this issue with him when I find out that another (very old) friend has a problem of their own. Of course, to them is it not a problem. If you can't pay your rent, put gas in your car or feed your kid but you can afford coke, no problem, right? You are doing it everyday or every other day and you are giving up the necessities of your life to buy it but that isn't a problem, right? Is it not a problem then until you sniff one too many lines and land yourself in the hospital, or better yet, the morgue?

A very good friend recently had to do an intervention with a family member who was doing herione. We are talking about a young adult, mid 20's, who has the world at their finger tips. The entire world and this person chooses a tiny pill that if taken too close to the last one can, and will, kill a person. This family was lucky and their loved one did not fight them. They admitted the problem and asked for help. I don't know many addicts who are strong enough to do that. I keep him in my thoughts daily.

The economy sucks. People are out of work and in debt up to their eyeballs. Is that why so many are turning to illegal and harmful drugs? I am no Pollyanna. If you know me in life, you know that I am no where near prude. I will admit, I have done cocaine. I am one of the few, the proud and the lucky that does not like it. The taste is horrible and I hate the way it makes me feel. Who wants to snort and grind all night for a "high"? I am personally more of a naturalist, if you will. If it comes from the earth, I am good with it. If I know it has been cut with Ajax, Drano and Meth...not so much for me. Drug dealers "cut" cocaine with the cheapest and most effective thing they can find. Keep that in mind. In high school many of the rich kids that I went to school with were hooked on coke. It was such a disgusting habit. They became disgusting people to me and I eventually skipped any gathering that I knew their crew would attend. It wasn't until I was well into my 20's and a regular on the gay bar scene that I had my first experience with coke. I could do 1 line and be good for the night. I don't need anymore alcohol but you might have to pry me off of the stage or out of the cage in order to leave. I never felt that pull to do more and I always hated myself the next day as it gave me horrible sinus pain.

For this reason, I don't understand the addictive properties that others experience. After I left my ex fiance he dabbled in coke pretty regularly. He got many of my friends at the time hooked on the shit. I remember going back to our old house after I had moved out, for a party. About 5 minutes after I arriced I realized it was just me and 1 other girl in the livingroom. Everyone else had piled into the bedroom. It used to be my house and my room so I went busting in. There before me one of my very best friends was cutting up lines for the room full of people. I grabbed my shit and tried to bolt but they all (including the ex) stopped me. It wasn't the time or place but I let them all have it about how irresponsible and ridiculous they were being. I told them I was pissed but it was none of my business. I assured them I would not be back to that house and if they continued on the road they were on I would not be seeing them anymore either. I know for a fact that 1 person in that room never touched coke again after that. Eventually they all cleaned themselves up. Well, I can't speak for the ex but my friends did.

I am sickened, saddened and repulsed by this Aspen Diet situation. The boys from my first example will no longer return my calls and requests to hang out. Perhaps someone has tipped them off that I am onto them. I had a theory about my 2nd example the "old friend". I thought that rock bottom needed to be met in order to get them help. After seeing this person and hanging out I realize that rock bottom will include a jail, a hospital or a morgue. Perhaps all 3 before it is said and done. I almost feel like these folks are trying to kill themselves in a slow painful death. Unfortunately this is not my first time at the Aspen Diet Rodeo. I have lived with people with addictions before. I did not see it until it was too late. I will NEVER miss the signs again. I am alert, I am present and I have got to do something.

8 years ago my friend, Jason, died of a heroine overdose. He was a childhood friend who lost his way. We were friends up until a few months before he died. We didn't talk anymore because of the people he hung out with and the needles he insisted on sticking in his arm, chasing that original high. I never tried to stop him or even confronted him about it, I just didn't hang out anymore. The guilt that I felt at watching his parents at his funeral say "if we had only known" and "if someone would have just told us what was going on". They might have been able to save Jason and they might not have. After living through that experience I will never again gamble with the life of a friend. I guess I am off to plan a few interventions. Wish me luck.